Shug Avery’s Kiss | On Love: Tiona Nekkia McClodden with Chloë Bass

As part of her Session project, Tiona Nekkia McClodden has organized a series of conversations in which she will be paired with a woman in her life to talk intimately and freely about a theme or topic related to Shug Avery within the physical space of Shug Avery’s Kiss. McClodden considers Avery to be her first example of an “uncompromising woman committed to a full self, inclusive of all the various identities she possesses….” Gathering with her discussant at a single table, it is McClodden’s hope to explore the various aspects of herself through dialogue with the women who mirror the respective theme of each conversation.There will be no Q+A and no audience participation during these conversations. There will be music and drinks before and after the conversation for everyone in the spirit of the juke joint. BYOB. For this first conversation, McClodden will talk with artist Chloë Bass on the topic of love as it relates to the following three prompts:

I.

She say, I love you, Miss Celie. And then she haul off and kiss me on the mouth.

Um, she say, like she surprise. I kiss her back, say, um, too. Us kiss and kiss till us can’t hardly kiss no more. Then us touch each other.

I don’t know nothing bout it, I say to Shug.

I don’t know much, she say.

—The Color Purple by Alice Walker

 

II. “Love is big. Love can hold anger, love can even hold hatred. I mean, you know, it’s all— it’s all love. It’s about the intention of what you want it to do. It’s about what you’re trying to give. And often when you’re trying to give something, you know, it has a lot of pain in it. But the pain too is a part of the love….Actually some pain is so severe that there’s nothing else you can do. I mean forgiveness is the only remedy.”

—An Interview with Alice Walker by Esther Iverem

III.

Love is abundant, and every relationship is unique

Love and respect instead of entitlement

Find your core set of relationship values

Heterosexism is rampant and out there, but don’t let fear lead you

Build for the lovely unexpected

Fake it til’ you make it

Trust is better

Change through communication

Customize your commitments

—The short instructional manifesto for relationship anarchy by Andie Nordgren