Longed for in Marriage: The Oneness of Encouragement & Criticism
Where: Aesthetic Realism Foundation
141 Greene St.
212-777-4490 Price: $10
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The Understanding Marriage! class of Saturday, January 12th, 11:00 AM to 12:30 PM, will be a wonderfully practical event conducted by Aesthetic Realism consultants Barbara Allen, Anne Fielding, and Meryl Nietsch-Cooperman. The class is open to all women.
The basis is this explanation by Eli Siegel, founder of Aesthetic Realism: “Marriage is a means for liking the world through a person. Too often, though, marriage is a contemptuous exclusion of the world.” And in the class, these illuminating sentences by Eli Siegel, from The Right of Aesthetic Realism to Be Known, will be taken up:
“Aesthetic Realism sees good will as the aesthetic oneness of encourage-ment and criticism….One of the reasons husbands and wives can’t talk to each other is that these two motives, wanting to be critical and also wanting to be sympathetic or considerate, cannot be managed right: if you’re considerate you are not critical, and if you’re critical you’re not considerate. But in the nature of things there is no reason why one can’t be both considerate and critical….The problem of being both compassionate and critical, of being both severe and feathery, is an aesthetic problem, a problem that, if solved, will always be like art.
Women will learn: marriage can succeed when there’s a deep and lively encouragement to be fair to the world. That is the good will which is like art itself, and is so necessary in love and marriage. Women will be learning, too, the difference between the criticism that is real encouragement, real love, and the hurtful put-down, or contempt, which has often been in how people have criticized each other. This education makes a woman stronger and prouder, and enables love to grow and flourish!
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